Dear Jacqui:
I am the husband of a woman I am still in love with after 12 years of marriage but I worry if she still cares about me. In the last few years my wife hasn't been very encouraging when I approach her sexually and I know for sure she's not interested in anyone else. Any suggestions?
Peter D.
"I worry if she still cares for me"
Dear Peter:
Great intimacy, whether it's physical or sexual, is based on open communication and that seems to be lacking between the two of you. Talk to your wife even if it feels a little awkward at first, discuss your needs and listen to hers. Lack of clarity between people leads to misunderstandings or worse. You might consider involving a couple's therapist a few times if the wall of silence is too difficult to break. Your problem may be psychological or physiological, often it is a combination of the two and you have to first acknowledge the cause of the problem before you can solve it. It's a real positive sign that you took the first step to do so. With your caring attitude, I'm sure you can move your relationship back to a romantic and more sexually enjoyable path.
Dear Jacqui:
I am divorced, forty-seven and have a boyfriend who is quite a bit younger and clearly very attracted to me. He is always ready for intimacy and we have an exciting sexual life. It is totally wonderful Unfortunately we don't share a great many other interests or activities which makes me wonder if this relationship is right for me?
Donna F.
"younger boyfriend...always ready"
Dear Donna:
It's real simple. Ask yourself if he enriches your life enough to continue the relationship or not and then answer the question with brutal honesty. If it's yes, then make an effort to discuss the issue with caring sensitivity. Maybe he too would like to enjoy a more encompassing life together. It's worthwhile exploring how you can develop activities and interests to share which might be new to both of you. If your answer is no, well then ...you know the scenario.
Very Private offers advice & products to help solve the physical or emotional problems people have that affect their relationships. Our objective is to help them achieve a happier, closer, and more fulfilling intimate relationship. For more information visit:
www.veryprivate.com Email your own question to info@veryprivate.com or fax: (310) 472-1479. We never reveal or give out names or addresses.
Jacqui's Bio:
Jacqueline Brandwynne is the creator of the Very Private® line of products.
Ms. Brandwynne enjoyed a classical education in her native Switzerland where she received her Diploma in Business from the Hoehere Toechterschule des Kantons Zuerich, (Business College). She continued her studies in philosophy and American Literature at The New School of Social Research in New York. She is fluent in English, German, French, Italian and Spanish.
Trained in all aspects of marketing and business strategy, Ms. Brandwynne, still in her twenties, turned around an unprofitable consumer company, Yardley of London, into an industry leader which was then sold to British American Tobacco, equivalent to a billion dollar deal today. This turn-around brought her great visibility and recognition. It also allowed her to form her own company, Brandwynne Associates specializing in turning around unsuccessful brands or divisions of Fortune 500 companies such as American Cyanamid, Bristol Myers Clairol, National Liberty Life Insurance, Revlon Mitchum-Thayer, Seagram & Sons, Sterling Drug Corp., and Fisons Limited, London. To each of her assignments she brought a unique combination of sharp business analysis and great creativity to solve specific marketing, distribution and/or financial problems.
In 1974 she merged her business and joined John Reed, then President and later Chairman of Citicorp as marketing strategist for the consumer division worldwide. Subsequently, Ms. Brandwynne was appointed to develop the business strategy of Citicorp's ten-year plan. This required the positioning of Citicorp within the global economic environment. She developed and described a model of the dynamics and the functions of the information economy and interpreted the implications of this emerging economic systems on particular industries and corporations.
Her insight and contribution became a cornerstone of the ensuing Citicorp strategy. Ms. Brandwynne managed an inside staff and outside team of scientists, industry specialists and academics from Harvard, MIT, Stanford, The Annenberg School of Communication, and Columbia University. With their participation she structured and supervised a global study on the convergence of telecommunications and computers. As a consequence of this study, she and her staff recognized the coming of the Internet early on. In l975 she described the coming electronic network as " The Global Conduit ."
In 1981, Ms. Brandwynne moved to Los Angeles to help reposition a small, single product soap company, Neutrogena. She developed the strategy to reposition the corporation as a beauty and healthcare company offering skin care, hair care and body care. She then became a key contributor in the highly successful execution of the strategy. Neutrogena was sold to Johnson & Johnson for close to 800 million dollars.
After leaving Neutrogena she started her own business and developed the line of Very Private® products that are currently being sold directly, on the web, through medical professionals and in various drugstores. The company's website is www.veryprivate.com.
Ms. Brandwynne has served in multiple advisory roles in several administrations.
She was an Advisor to The Council of Economic Advisors under its Chairman, Herbert Stein, during Presidents Nixon and Ford's administrations.
She has been a member of the United States Trade Representatives' Services Policy Advisory Committee under President Ford.
Ms.Brandwynne chaired an Economic Summit at The White House at which both President Reagan and Secretary Baker participated.
At the request of President Carter, she consulted in the development of a new competitive strategy for the United States along with the CEO's of fifty major US corporations, the Presidents of the leading US Universities, Labor Unions and members of the White House and Congress.
Ms. Brandwynne has served on the Boards of Directors of several public companies and non-for profit organizations including Monogram Industries, Neutrogena Corporation, The Los Angeles Opera, The California Institute of the Arts, the Santa Fe Institute, the Entrepreneurial Studies Center at UCLA, the board of the "Amici degli Uffici" in Florence, Italy.
She is a member of the Committee of 200 as well as
a member of the Los Angeles Trusteeship (Los Angeles Forum).
She has been a speaker at universities and international forums on the subjects of strategy and market competitiveness.
Ms. Brandwynne writes a column on health, beauty and relationships which is read
by several million readers. She is a regularly contributor on radio, television and the Internet on the same subjects as well as business.
For more information please send an email to:
info@veryprivate.com
