Dryness & Relationship Problems.? by Jacqueline Brandwynne    Often men believe that when a woman is not aroused she no longer is interested in him or doesn't love him anymore. Also, many women who lack moisture before intimacy believe that there is something wrong with them.    In most cases both partners have made the wrong conclusion. Non-response in a woman is most often caused by a lack of available vaginal moisture due to low estrogen levels. Estrogen, the primary female hormone which is created by the ovaries varies throughout the life of a woman. Estrogen levels are extremely low right after the birth of a child, they gradually diminish as the women enters menopause until the ovaries stop producing estrogen when she is finished with menopause.    But there are other reasons for dryness: above all stress. Statistics tell us that 95% of all sexually active women have occasional symptoms of vaginal dryness due to stress. For more information on vaginal dryness, please read our wonderful articles featured in the Very Private.com Vaginal Health section. Jacqui Why can't I make him love me? Dear Jacqui:    Hi, I've been seeing this guy for almost two years. When we first met we were really good friends, I found him annoying at first. He reminded me of this guy I couldn't stand, so I stopped calling him and about three months later out of nowhere he called me and we hung out. We had sex, that was the first time and ever since that we've been having sex. It was good at first but now I love him and want to be with him and it's not mutual, or at least I think it's not.    He says he doesn't want a girlfriend because of his last girlfriend. I don't understand why he just doesn't love me, I don't even know if he does or not, or if just scared. He never gives me straight answers. He'll tell me that he's not good for me and that this is bad. But I want to know that if it's so bad why does it feel so right to me? He is like so anti-love. But just recently he started asking me questions like: Why do I love him and he's started acting different towards me not to much but enough to make me question it, like he started playing with me like poking me but in a affectionate way, does any of this mean anything? I can't just give up on him    I've tried I won't call him for a month or two or even see him and then he'll call me or he'll show up at my house. One night I told him I couldn't do this anymore and he wouldn't leave, like it wasn't hard enough to tell the man I love I never want to see him again. By the way I'm 19 and he's 26. Were both Sagittarius'... Were so much alike, we use to have fun together. Believe it or not we've never even had and argument. I could never do anything to hurt him I love him.    I always wondered what it would feel like when you love someone and I believe it is this, but I didn't know it was suppose to hurt so bad. Every time something is wrong with him I know, for example, I kept having these bad dreams that I was going to visit him but he was dead and I was at the cemetery. Two day's later he got into a bad car accident... I don't know what I would have done if anything would have happened to him.    If I can't be with him I just really want the best for him and I want him to realize how much I love him, when I tell him, he tells me to stop... I also want to know if he loves me, he's never told me so basically that's what keeps holding me... He say's he doesn't sleep with anyone else, but who knows. I date other people but just to try and get my mind off of him. But I would do anything to be with him... Please help me... Robin Dear Robin:    Your feelings of love are genuine and it is hard to accept that the man you are in love with does not have the capacity, at least at this time, to reciprocate your feelings. We understand that this causes you a lot or stress and a sense of rejection. Unfortunately, nobody has the ability to make someone else love or feel a certain way. But, in most cases, his feelings and his actions have nothing to do with you.    He probably simply isn't ready or doesn't know how to love. Maybe he did indeed have some painful or difficult experiences that make him unable to open up at this time, even if you are the most wonderful person he's ever met. So you really have only two choices and neither is what you most want. One is to stop seeing him which you tried. We know this is difficult but time has a way of healing your pains and frustration.    The other is for the two of you to try to improve communication between you. Don't accuse him of not loving you, maybe you should listen to him and find out his frustrations and fears. That might bring you closer, at least it will give you a better understanding as to how you wish to proceed. And then, remember, we have the wonderful ability to experience love more than once in our lives. Jacqui    Very Private offers advice & products to help solve the physical or emotional problems people have that affect their relationships. Our objective is to help them achieve a happier, closer, and more fulfilling intimate relationship. For more information visit: www.veryprivate.com Email your own question to info@veryprivate.com or fax: (310) 472-1479. We never reveal or give out names or addresses. Jacqui's Bio:    Jacqueline Brandwynne is the creator of the Very Private® line of products.    Ms. Brandwynne enjoyed a classical education in her native Switzerland where she received her Diploma in Business from the Hoehere Toechterschule des Kantons Zuerich, (Business College). She continued her studies in philosophy and American Literature at The New School of Social Research in New York. She is fluent in English, German, French, Italian and Spanish.    Trained in all aspects of marketing and business strategy, Ms. Brandwynne, still in her twenties, turned around an unprofitable consumer company, Yardley of London, into an industry leader which was then sold to British American Tobacco, equivalent to a billion dollar deal today. This turn-around brought her great visibility and recognition. It also allowed her to form her own company, Brandwynne Associates specializing in turning around unsuccessful brands or divisions of Fortune 500 companies such as American Cyanamid, Bristol Myers Clairol, National Liberty Life Insurance, Revlon Mitchum-Thayer, Seagram & Sons, Sterling Drug Corp., and Fisons Limited, London. To each of her assignments she brought a unique combination of sharp business analysis and great creativity to solve specific marketing, distribution and/or financial problems.    In 1974 she merged her business and joined John Reed, then President and later Chairman of Citicorp as marketing strategist for the consumer division worldwide. Subsequently, Ms. Brandwynne was appointed to develop the business strategy of Citicorp's ten-year plan. This required the positioning of Citicorp within the global economic environment. She developed and described a model of the dynamics and the functions of the information economy and interpreted the implications of this emerging economic systems on particular industries and corporations.    Her insight and contribution became a cornerstone of the ensuing Citicorp strategy. Ms. Brandwynne managed an inside staff and outside team of scientists, industry specialists and academics from Harvard, MIT, Stanford, The Annenberg School of Communication, and Columbia University. With their participation she structured and supervised a global study on the convergence of telecommunications and computers. As a consequence of this study, she and her staff recognized the coming of the Internet early on. In l975 she described the coming electronic network as "The Global Conduit ."    In 1981, Ms. Brandwynne moved to Los Angeles to help reposition a small, single product soap company, Neutrogena. She developed the strategy to reposition the corporation as a beauty and healthcare company offering skin care, hair care and body care. She then became a key contributor in the highly successful execution of the strategy. Neutrogena was sold to Johnson & Johnson for close to 800 million dollars.    After leaving Neutrogena she started her own business and developed the line of Very Private® products that are currently being sold directly, on the web, through medical professionals and in various drugstores. The company's website is www.veryprivate.com.    Ms. Brandwynne has served in multiple advisory roles in several administrations.    She was an Advisor to The Council of Economic Advisors under its Chairman, Herbert Stein, during Presidents Nixon and Ford's administrations.    She has been a member of the United States Trade Representatives' Services Policy Advisory Committee under President Ford.    Ms.Brandwynne chaired an Economic Summit at The White House at which both President Reagan and Secretary Baker participated.    At the request of President Carter, she consulted in the development of a new competitive strategy for the United States along with the CEO's of fifty major US corporations, the Presidents of the leading US Universities, Labor Unions and members of the White House and Congress.    Ms. Brandwynne has served on the Boards of Directors of several public companies and non-for profit organizations including Monogram Industries, Neutrogena Corporation, The Los Angeles Opera, The California Institute of the Arts, the Santa Fe Institute, the Entrepreneurial Studies Center at UCLA, the board of the "Amici degli Uffici" in Florence, Italy.    She is a member of the Committee of 200 as well as a member of the Los Angeles Trusteeship (Los Angeles Forum).      She has been a speaker at universities and international forums on the subjects of strategy and market competitiveness.    Ms. Brandwynne writes a column on health, beauty and relationships which is read by several million readers. She is a regularly contributor on radio, television and the Internet on the same subjects as well as business.    For more information please send an email to:info@veryprivate.com

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